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Why do you get to be so happy, live a life so full,
While the crumbled remains of my heart lay in your wake? Why do you get to look like perfection, nothing broken, smiling so big? When every time I see you, think of you, hear of you My chest grows tight with rejection, imperfection, misdirection... I was loyal, you were not. Turning your back when things grew rocky, Yelling, screaming, cursing, shaming, Giving ultimatums, pointing, blaming. Playing the victim when I needed a break From the yelling and screaming and shaming I faced. Then saying I rejected you! Trashing my name, continuing to shame. Were you afraid of my truth? Afraid it would show a possible flaw in the stands you take, in the perfection you fake? Well now we wait. For what? I don't know... I don't know... because now I doubt everything I once knew.
painful revelations about myself
bring me to a lonely place of solitude and grace humbling me to a silent scream loud, yet serene wrenching out the pain of seeing who I've been, who I'm being this lonely place of solitude, of grace gives me pause to think who have I been? who am i being? painful revelations about myself silently screaming my thoughts careening who have i been? who am i being? what do i do? where do i go? how do i know? painful revelations about myself become clear, become clear with each year, each tear with heartache, with fear lingering on the edges of the moments i live delicately dominating everything i give to life and love to family and foe painful revelations about myself bring me to a lonely place to silently scream to sit, serene to see who i have been and decide who i am being |
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